I WANT A NEIGH
My littlest one has suddenly become obsessed with horses the past two weeks. He calls them "neighs" and wants to watch videos of horses on YouTube all the time.
I've started to dream in horses. Watching the videos awakened some kind of longing in me that has been dormant for a long time. When he reaches to the computer screen and opens and closes his hand and starts whining, "mine, neigh, mine, neigh!" I completely understand. Watching them on the screen is just not enough.
I want a neigh.
Of course, he is only two and doesn't remember ever seeing a horse up close. He doesn't know what I know. He doesn't know about the great wonderful feeling of giving a horse hug, of being on top of a horse and leaning over to hug their neck and bury your face in their mane (only possible if you are not riding in a western saddle - otherwise you get a saddlehorn in your gut). He doesn't know how it feels to have a horse rub its head on your back, or to press your face up against their face, or to exchange warm breaths through each other's nostrils ( a true equine greeting). He doesn't know about the incredible physical sensation of riding, about how it feels like flying when you go over a jump together, or the complete bliss of cantering bareback and raising your hands in the sky as if in communication with our maker. He has no idea about the collabrative partnership of teaching a horse a new skill, how cool it is when you finally get that sidepass you were asking for, or when the horse understands what a flying lead change is all about.
I do, but I have supressed all these things for a long time. After I sold my horse, I tried to convince myself that my relationships with my dogs would compensate. After all, I get a lot of the same benefits of a relationship with a horse at about half the expense and hassle. I don't have to worry about hitching a trailer to take my dogs out into the wilderness. I can still have the kind of partnership, still work on teaching new things to an animal, have experiences with them, have a deep relationship with something that doesn't understand my language but still understands me. We can still sit and watch the sunset and sigh together and be one in spirit.
But it is not the same. The more I watch the videos, the more I see what I am missing. There is nothing like a deep relationship with a horse. When a person and a dog do something in unison, when a training moment finally clicks, it feels like you are sharing one mind, and that is cool. When a horse and a person do something in unison, when they come together with a goal in mind, it is more than sharing one mind, it is sharing one body. It is the true expression of the term "and two become one".
People say that about marriage, I think that is even part of most people's vows, part of the expectation of marriage. Two bodies become united into one flesh. That is not really as true with people as it is with horses, though. You don't become so linked with your spouse that you are in constant communication to move in unison together literally. You are still two people. In a deep relationship with a horse, there is a spiritual connection as well as a physical one, and two bodies become so intertwined that they move as if of one mind. Your thoughts and desires move through the reins, through your seat in the saddle, through your legs, without even realizing it, and the horse responds to those thoughts and adjusts accordingly.
I want to experience this again. At first I started to think about taking lessons again just to get around horses again. Then I considered leasing a horse to avoid the expense and commitment of actually buying one. The more I think about it, though, it is not just the fun of riding that I want to experience. I want it all. I want to have a true, deep, intimate relationship with a horse. I want to be able to train a horse to work in new ways with me, to challenge myself to work on my training and communication skills. I want the bond between a horse and handler, I want to experience true horse love.
Sigh. I want a neigh.
I am going to post a couple of my favorite videos that kind of represent the level of deep understanding and complex training that I want in my life.
I've started to dream in horses. Watching the videos awakened some kind of longing in me that has been dormant for a long time. When he reaches to the computer screen and opens and closes his hand and starts whining, "mine, neigh, mine, neigh!" I completely understand. Watching them on the screen is just not enough.
I want a neigh.
Of course, he is only two and doesn't remember ever seeing a horse up close. He doesn't know what I know. He doesn't know about the great wonderful feeling of giving a horse hug, of being on top of a horse and leaning over to hug their neck and bury your face in their mane (only possible if you are not riding in a western saddle - otherwise you get a saddlehorn in your gut). He doesn't know how it feels to have a horse rub its head on your back, or to press your face up against their face, or to exchange warm breaths through each other's nostrils ( a true equine greeting). He doesn't know about the incredible physical sensation of riding, about how it feels like flying when you go over a jump together, or the complete bliss of cantering bareback and raising your hands in the sky as if in communication with our maker. He has no idea about the collabrative partnership of teaching a horse a new skill, how cool it is when you finally get that sidepass you were asking for, or when the horse understands what a flying lead change is all about.
I do, but I have supressed all these things for a long time. After I sold my horse, I tried to convince myself that my relationships with my dogs would compensate. After all, I get a lot of the same benefits of a relationship with a horse at about half the expense and hassle. I don't have to worry about hitching a trailer to take my dogs out into the wilderness. I can still have the kind of partnership, still work on teaching new things to an animal, have experiences with them, have a deep relationship with something that doesn't understand my language but still understands me. We can still sit and watch the sunset and sigh together and be one in spirit.
But it is not the same. The more I watch the videos, the more I see what I am missing. There is nothing like a deep relationship with a horse. When a person and a dog do something in unison, when a training moment finally clicks, it feels like you are sharing one mind, and that is cool. When a horse and a person do something in unison, when they come together with a goal in mind, it is more than sharing one mind, it is sharing one body. It is the true expression of the term "and two become one".
People say that about marriage, I think that is even part of most people's vows, part of the expectation of marriage. Two bodies become united into one flesh. That is not really as true with people as it is with horses, though. You don't become so linked with your spouse that you are in constant communication to move in unison together literally. You are still two people. In a deep relationship with a horse, there is a spiritual connection as well as a physical one, and two bodies become so intertwined that they move as if of one mind. Your thoughts and desires move through the reins, through your seat in the saddle, through your legs, without even realizing it, and the horse responds to those thoughts and adjusts accordingly.
I want to experience this again. At first I started to think about taking lessons again just to get around horses again. Then I considered leasing a horse to avoid the expense and commitment of actually buying one. The more I think about it, though, it is not just the fun of riding that I want to experience. I want it all. I want to have a true, deep, intimate relationship with a horse. I want to be able to train a horse to work in new ways with me, to challenge myself to work on my training and communication skills. I want the bond between a horse and handler, I want to experience true horse love.
Sigh. I want a neigh.
I am going to post a couple of my favorite videos that kind of represent the level of deep understanding and complex training that I want in my life.
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