Is Happiness overrated? I have this question because lately I have been having some minor "freakouts" (episodes of extreme sadness, crying jags, or angry outburts), maybe five or so in the last couple of weeks. It makes me wonder if I should call for help, but then I don't know who to schedule an appointment with: my doctor, who wants to diagnose every complaint I have as "allergies", my psychiatrist, who wants to put me on drugs every time I walk in the door, or my therapist(s), who feels like someone I am paying to be my friend. My best friend says I am fine and it is just a combination of lack of sleep, stress, feeling overwhelmed with responsibility at home, etc etc. I wonder if some of it is not caused by the drop in hormones at this many months post partum. I wonder this because the same elements are there that have been there the five months since my baby was born, only they are just now causing this reaction. I have been dealing with the same things all along; why would they just now begin to get to me?
I am trying to remember to take the fish oil, which seemed to help so much with "balancing my mood" during my pregnancy, during a time where I really could have been depressed with some of the things I was dealing with, but wasn't. Exercise seems to help substantially. However, I feel like I am having a very hard time dealing with my stress level lately and feel the urge to start smoking again very strongly. It was not as hard as I thought to quit, and for months now I haven't thought about it at all, and even felt disgust when I saw other people doing it, but lately every day I have been thinking about it. Is there a Nicotine Anonymous club? Because I would so go to that. I feel like I need a 'phone-a-friend' to talk me out of it and help me resist the urge.
I want to elaborate on my feelings about the overmedicating of America by the psych industry, and my various medication misadventures, but instead I think I should clean the kitchen. My husband is probably frustrated by now by the fact that I spend more time on the computer than I do doing housework (but then again he does none of the housework himself...well that is a whole different issue, watch for further posts about the women's lib movement biting us women in the ass)