Sunday, August 30, 2009
Thursday, August 20, 2009
So, we're driving down a small Arizona highway. It's raining outside. T tells me this probably means geocaching is out for now, but I am still kind of tracking upcoming ones wi
We zoomed past it, but were so intrigued we turned around and came back. The door, which you see in the first photo, was unusually small, and took up the entirely of the front of the small building. There was a geocache somewhere behind the church, but the rain was coming down, so we ran out of the car and in through the unusual door. As we shut the door, a woman in a pickup pulled up and parked next to our
Turns out she is a local, and frequent visitor to this holy place. She pulls her windbreaker off and begins telling us the history of this unusual place. She indicates a guest sign in book, and tells us to write a little prayer in the notebook by the altar and leave it for the next guests to share. She often comes here, she says, to celebrate her faith. Sometimes she has company, but mostly she enjoys the place solo. This woman has been helping with the wildfires in the west, and tells us of her job refueling the helicopters that bring the water to fight the fires, and of eating her meals in the town outside of the Grand Canyon we are headed to next. She shares history of weddings and baptisms that have been held in the place. Then she writes down her own prayer and leaves us to enjoy the place alone.
The inside is remarkably roomy, and stark, but fills one with a sense of peace. One does indeed feel closer to God in a place like this. The children check out the altar. I read the verse that the Bible on the altar is open to, and write a prayer in the book. I notice that the woman's prayer was one of thanks for the rain, and left ours asking for a safe journey and strength for our family.
As we left the sanctuary, the rain had stilled, and so had all our tension from the first day of our journey. We all felt at peace and calm. I was able to go behind the church and to the side to find the geocache, which was an ammo can filled with trinkets and holding a sparkling gold keychain travel bug, which I was excited about.
We all climbed back in the car, feeling refreshed and ready to tackle the next couple of hours of driving before we reached that night's destination. That calm stayed with me the rest of our trip, though, and so did the appreciation for this tranquil stop on our crazy journey.
I was so excited to look for this one, but not so excited not to have found it, especially before the thunder and impending rainstorm chased us out of the search area.
Who knew Arizona could be so green?
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Once, my sister had told me, "maybe you just don't understand death." It was her way to trying to oversimplify why I didn't make it to a relative's funeral. I never really got into it with her, but she was wrong, as she usually is. That had nothing to do with it.
In reality, I am more comfortable with it than most people, but it is not even that. I know all about death, from a biological perspective. I know how much time it takes for each stage of cell death to occur, what is happening inside the body, how long until rigor mortis sets in. I have held hundreds for their certain death, and some died in my arms before we could expect it, or plan for it. I know how quickly I need to tag 'em and bag 'em before the smell starts to penetrate the air. I have sat with a stethescope while a literal wall of dead dogs were piling up before me, verifying death before each body was taken to the cooler. I have walked an old horse over snowy fields with her side cut open, trying to make it to the kill area before she keeled over. I have killed many, many times myself, dogs and cats and a few other species.
I know animals are not exactly like people. I know there is something different. The biology is the same, but our emotional attachment is different. We see humans as intrinsically more valuable than animals, even with our own pets. I know a lot of my vet tech friends consider their pets to be like their children...however, I also know that most of them are like me, in that for their human children, there would be no bounds to saving a life or finding a cure for a terminal disease, but our pets come with a financial limit, and in the end, we would all consider euthanasia as a viable alternative to prolonging their suffering, or reducing the impact on our finances.
These days, I am not going over the bereavement process and asking clients to decide on body care, or pick the urn that best represents the way they want to remember their pet. My patients don't have names, they have numbers. Part of the reason we don't name them is to reduce the emotional attachment to them. I always have to tell myself I love them collectively, not individually. I tell myself that not to make myself feel better about their inevitable deaths, but to feel better about the fact that most of the time, their deaths don't affect me emotionally. It is a reminder that I still care, that I am not so blase about death that it no longer bothers me.
Most days, I shake off their deaths like a pair of dirty scrubs at the end of a workday. Death is a part of the job. For a moment, I did the same thing when I was told the news about a couple of animals I had been working closely with. I received the news with the same shrug of my shoulders and little frown of sadness. I saw with my own eyes that their injuries were catastrophic, and accepted rationally that euthanasia was the only alternative.
Later, I began to engage emotionally with their death, and in this, I realized that some part of death is still a mystery to me. Human death we can convince ourselves to accept through our faith. What I mean is the question of where the soul goes. It is unfathomable to believe that the spirit of a person is simply just gone when the body stills, so we attach cultural or spiritual beliefs to its final destination. We tell ourselves that spirit is now in Heaven, or watching over us, or waiting to be reborn in another body, another lifetime.
Many people who work with animals believe that animals have no souls. I don't believe this myself, but we don't do much thinking on what happens to their souls after death. In my mind, there is a beautiful grassy meadow somewhere on the other side, with dogs chasing elusive squirrels in bodies free of pain. This maybe only a personal myth I created to help me deal with constant death around me, some sort of prevention against what they term "compassion fatigue", a real syndrome among my industry.
What do we define as the soul of a person? Their personality, the "inner core', their psychological attributes? If that is so, how can we look at animals and think they have no souls? To me, animals always have personality. There are different ways of approaching animals with different personalities. Based on their responses towards, say, a human approaching them, you could classify them on their personalities and treat them in accordance. A dog who is predominately fearful is handled in a different physical manner than one who is aggressive.
And I knew the personalities of the ones involved. Twelve animals that I had known for two years were placed in the same room, with the same set of controls. Two were put together, and two were put down. I knew the personalities of everyone in that room.
And yet I didn't ask for an ID number. It's like I didn't want to know, wanted to stumble upon it for next documentation and try to put the pieces on it. I was familiar with each one, how they responded to things. I had classified their personalities. I didn't need to know their number to know how things might have gone down.
And now I wondered where it went, where did it go when that needle hit home. Did the patient just die, and that's all she wrote? Is there a heaven for monkeys up there?
Do monkeys have soul? Do they ascend in any meaningful way? Is there a great reward for them up there, for spending their life in a cage, waiting for their turn to die for mankind?
I hope so. And I do love them. Sometimes I think God is working through me, or allowing me to work for them, as directed by him. Is it all part of some grand design?
The problem is, what happened was something everyone thought I would try, at some point down the road. Maybe, but I was years away from it, I felt. It was a wild risk. Yet, it was performed by...not me. I would not have attempted that, but now that someone has, I feel the eyes upon me.
Lord. Lead, guide, and direct me.
Monday, July 13, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
hardings found A Foodie's Paradise (Traditional Cache)
Okay, funny story about this cache. I am in town for a dog show, and was staying closer to the Alamo, but wanted to come this way to see Barney Smith's Toilet Seat Museum. Apparently, I left my GPSr on or something, and it drained the battery and I had brought no extras. I didn't anticipate needing them! Well, now I had to find batteries, which meant a store, one that was open early on a Sunday. Luckily, I took the right path (led my instinct about these things I guess) and ended up here. Only, I had no idea this was the place the cache was in. Well, I had gotten some great salami and cheese here along with the batteries, and on the way out of the store, the cashier and I were talking, and she was saying this was the only grocery store close to downtown at all. Amazing.Once I got the batteries, I couldn't get reception for so long that I had driven north and west of here by about a mile and a half, and did the caches I had planned over there, and made my way here for the cache...ending up where I started at. How wild. At first I almost gave up on the cache, but it was just blending really well. Left a TB. Thanks!
Monday, July 06, 2009
I spent my Fourth of July with my best friend and our kids. We checked out the festivities planned in The Woodlands and spent all day swimming, going to parks, and watching fireworks with the kids. The night before, we had gone out to a bar together. Of all the great fun we had during the sixteen hours or so we spent together, the best part, the part I will always remember, was at the end of the Saturday night. Both of the little ones had nodded off, and the bigger kids were outside with my husband and the neighbors, and she and I were just having some girl time. We were standing outside my back porch and she asked me a question about how something I had planned on Thursday worked out for me. We got a good laugh out of the fact that in all that time we had spent together, we had never got past talking about the events of Friday and Saturday. Then, I told her this story, which had us laughing so hard, at my expense, that we were doubled over with our legs crossed trying not to laugh so hard we peed ourselves.
I can't duplicate the story the way I told it. There is something about the written word that is different from true storytelling in person. I'll try to recreate it, though.
Thursday, I had been asked to do a presentation at another company for an audience of people that were much more highly educated than myself on my particular field of expertise. The presentation had actually been moved up a week, so I was kind of thrown off mentally by that, and also by the presence of my boss and her friend, who is the "boss" of the program I was presenting to. In the past four months, I had been asked to give a similar presentation to people within our company, but we are low-tech here and so all the new-fangled presentation devices were kind of throwing me off. On the podium were the microphones and the computer screen with my presentation on it, which was projected on to a big screen with a teleprompter up front on the floor.
There were three presenters that day, and the first one was the "big boss", who runs the entire department and has lots of letters behind her name. She gave a presentation on anatomy and physiology that had me feeling intimidated. Then my boss spoke, also with many letters behind her name, but not as many, and then there was me, with at least half as much education as anyone else and a "fluffy" topic. All these things combined had me a little nervous when I got up to talk. I'm blaming what happened next on all that.
When I got up to the podium and started my presentation, for some reason I walked AWAY from the podium and went up to the floor level, reading my presentation from the teleprompter a' la karoake style. What the hell was I doing? I realized my mistake after the first slide, and headed back to the podium and the mics. However, I was so flustered that the rest of it came out of my mouth like a robot talking. I was trying so hard to not make more mistakes that I was wooden and stiff up there. Also, I was dismayed that all this video footage I had gotten to make my presentation "come alive" would not play correctly.
At the end of the presentation, I sat down in my seat, beating myself up over not being able to "shine" with a stellar speaking performance, when the "boss lady" leaned over at me. I was taken aback with what she said.
"Hey, listen, " she says, "I run this other program at another college, too, and I would like to have you come do this same presentation for those students. Are you interested in doing that?"
Bahahahaha! J and I died over that one. Not what I was expecting her to say at ALL after that!
Sunday, July 05, 2009
This is where we had lunch on the day of our tenth wedding anniversary. We sat by this creek with a bottle of wine and sampled some good food. We highly recommend the pulled pork. We each tasted five wines before deciding on a Reisling from Plum Creek Cellars. Good times.
Fondue for Two in Manitou at The Mona Lisa
This is where we had dinner that night. We chose the Old World Cheese, the wild game entree, and the Milk Chocolate for dessert. It is very good, very pricey, and an experience worth having at least once. This was my second time here. I went here when Ted and I were first dating with an old boyfriend and we got in a big fight over it. I remembered it as being a little better than it was this time, but I think that is because the wild game was a little too adventurous for me. I find elk meat to be much tougher than beef. We got so full here on food and wine that we were worthless for anything else after this, and curtailed all planned additional activities...
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
"Do you have an unusually high IQ?" she asks me in all serious. I don't really want to get into explaining this, although there is little to explain. I just smile at her and tell her I don't know anything about that.
Later, we talk about a pressing problem, and she says to me, "See, you're trying to apply logic to it. That doesn't work. It's an actual equation. Logic, applied to emotional context, equals frustration."
I don't really understand why it has to be like this. I talk to Jib about it and she says of course, emotions have very little to do with logic.
And when we talk, I tell her it reminds me of something funny. I did take an IQ test once, that I know of. It was a three day long test we took in high school, and when you were eighteen, you could get your results. Three of us went down to the counselors when we were of age and asked for the results. There were three types of tests applied. One was just a general knowledge, and two were mathematical in nature, which included quantitative and qualitative math.
My scores were where I expected them to be. Now, for those who have not looked too deep into IQ tests, what the test really means is how is your "intelligence" compared to your peers. One hundred percent means that you are exactly average. Most courts use around 70 points or below to determine mental retardation. I always figured I would score "slightly higher than normal". On this test, the "genius" level was 130. I got close to that number on two tests, but one test I scored above genius on - qualitative mathematics, or "logic".
This test was mostly recognizing patterns. Part of it involved looking at an imaginary piece of paper. The test described actions taken to the piece of paper, and you had to pick the image that best represented what the result would be. You had to recognize the pattern and anticipate the end result.
Kind of like I do at work, I think. I tell Jibber this, and she agrees.
"That's what makes you good at what you do."
And I think of Misty, who is probably the most "logical" person I know, and nights we worked together under a crazy boss. There were times I was venting, frustrated, and she looked me right in the eyes and said, "Yes, but you are applying reason to an irrational person. It doesn't work." It seems like I do that a lot.
I like reason. I want it to stick around. Reason seems like truth, reason takes in all the facts, reason does not give in to emotional impulse. Reason thinks through what they are going to say based on the circumstances, not on the fly. I like reason, but I can't say I always follow it. I believe I also have high impulsivity, which acts on emotion, and so my life is a series of logical steps interrupted by impulsive dances, all the while focusing on the patterns in attempt to gain some kind of cosmic truth.
"You must know that you are very bright," the lady says to me again, the next time we meet. "Very wise for your years."
Every time I want to agree with this statement, I think that if I took an accurate IQ test now, I would score lower. I know this man who is super smart, and makes me feel like small potatoes. It's all relative to your peers.
This same man posted something online that I found really interesting (shamelessly stoled from the HCGC boards):
"....also always tryyy to keep in mind that 2 people trying to communicate that are 10 or more IQ points apart may come away with a completely different message than intended especially if the communication is written.
This week, I might run into that man at say, a mexican restaurant, and I'm gonna ask him what his IQ is. I'm very curious now.
Then I am going to ask him,
"Now, is this general, or qualitative, or quantitative?"
I mean, let's be logical about this.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Amended list from Oct 2001,
Checked over for archived caches and updates.
As of June 2009, these are the oldest caches still listed:
1. GC30, 5/11/2000 Kansas, Mingo by The Kansas Stasher
2. GC12, 5/12/2000 Oregon, Geocache by Jerry Connelly3. GC28, 5/13/2000 Illinois, Beverly by Robert Reindl
4. GC3E, 5/18/2000 New South Wales, Australia, Lane Cove by Paul Edwards
5. GC46, 5/26/2000 New Zealand, Geocache by Kevin AndeO'Byrne rson
6. GC39, 5/26/2000 New York, The Spot by GPS_Fool
7. 19. GC31, 5/31/2000 Kansas, Arikaree by The Kansas Stasher
8. GC1D, 6/3/2000 Georgia, Beaver Cache by Jim Gooch
9. GC43, 6/3/2000 Ireland, Geocache by Chris
10. GC16, 6/4/2000 Oregon, Geocache by Jerry Connelly
11. GC1E, 6/11/2000 Georgia, Stone Mountain by Chris Reynolds
12. GC53, 6/15/2000 Kenya, Rift Valley (Virtual Cache) 
13. GC25, 6/17/2000 Idaho, Camels Prairie Stash by Moun10Bike, Cindy, Laura and Jasmine
14. GC37, 6/20/2000 Missouri, Missouri's First - Watts Mill by Steve Brown
15. GCD, 6/21/2000 Washington, Geocache by ajromanelli
16.GC26, 6/21/2000 Idaho, Two roads by Ry Jones
17. GC27, 6/21/2000 Idaho, Eggcellent by Ry Jones
18. GC1F, 6/22/2000 Georgia, Geocache by Jim Pate
19.GC4B, 6/25/2000 New Zealand, Aukland Stash by nz_etrex
20.GC1B, 6/27/2000 Arkansas, Gorilla Stash by Ed Normandy
21.GC18, 7/2/2000 Colorado, Tarryall by Mike Frazier
22 GC40, 7/7/2000 Belgium, Geocache by Pierre Cao
23 GC35, 7/16/2000 Michigan, Power Island by Kluso
24. GC20, 7/17/2000 Georgia, Geocache by Jeff Andrews
25. GC19, 7/20/2000 Colorado, Geocache by Rob Garrison
26. GC 17, 7/21/2000 Oregon, Geocache by Jerry Connelly
27. GC23, 7/21/2000 Hawaii, Geocache by Tim Billings
28.GC21, 8/16/2000 Georgia, Lake Lanier by Jay Chamberlain
29 GC36, 8/21/2000 Michigan, Geocache by Gregory Benn
30. GC3B, 8/27/2000 Utah, Potters Pond by leaper64 & dirk88
31. GC57, 9/9/2000 Arizona, Geocache by Dan Rich
32. GC5B, 9/10/2000 California, Phil's Memorial Cache (Oldest CA. Cache) by GoodDogSD
33 GC5C, 9/17/2000 Idaho, Southern Idaho's First! by Eric
34 GC62, 9/26/2000 Texas Tombstone
35 GC67, 9/28/2000 Colorado, Paul Barclay Stash by Terry Shelton
36. GC 68, 9/29/2000 Alaska, Centurion Guards by Gary Short
37. GC6A, 9/30/2000 Denmark, Kippers in the Jungle by Klaus Alexander Seistrup
38. GC6E, 9/30/2000 Alaska, KidsGeoCache by Gary Short
39. GC70, 9/30/2000 North Carolina, Octopus Garden
40. GC72, 9/30/2000 Finland, Sun Gear by Kalle Reunanen
41. GC74, 10/1/2000 Massachusetts, First Mass by Jeremy Gilbert
42. GC76, 10/1/2000 Georgia, Rock Town
43. GC77, 10/2/2000 Germany, First Germany
44. GC78, 10/2/2000 California, Firestone
45. GC7A, 10/8/2000 Australia, Melbourne's 1st
46. GC7B, 10/8/2000 Arizona T824 Table Mesa
47. GC7E, 10/8/2000 Arizona, Labyrinth Canyon
48. GC7C, 10/9/2000 Utah Beaver Springs
49. GC7D, 10/9/2000 Massachusetts, Lowell, aka Second Mass
50. GC80, 10/9/2000 Utah Little Creek Stash
51. GC85, 10/14/2000 Massachussetts Camera Cache
52. GC 86 10/14/2000 Vermont 1
53. GC89 10/15/2000 Georgia Iron Horse
54. GC8A 10/15/2000 Utah Pony Express
55. GC90 10/19/2000 Mississippi Bonita Lakes
56. GC92 10/22/2000 Oregon Un-Original Stash
57. GC93 10/23/2000 Indiana's First
58. GC98 10/28/2000 Texas Double
59. GC9B 10/28/2000 Utah Clover Spring Stash
60. GC9C 10/27/2000 California Rabbit Eye View
61. GC9E 10/29/2000 New Hampshire Mines Follies
62. GCA0 10/30/2000 California Creekside Stash
63. GCA1 10/31/2000 Texas A Walk in the Park64. GCA5 11/4/2000 Oregon Hembre Ridge
65. GCA8 11/4/2000 Utah Wah Wah Stash
66. GCAB 11/8/2000 California Orange County Stash
67. GCAD 11/11/2000 Australia Devil Bend
68. GCAE 11/12/2000 New York Sleepy Hollow 1
69. GCAF 11/11/2000 New Zealand Mount Cargill
70. GCBO 11/11/2000 New Zealand Flagstaff Hill
71. GCB1 11/12/2000 New Zealand Unity Park
72. GCB2 11/12/2000 New Zealand Botanical Gardens
73. GCB6 11/13/2000 Georgia Yellow River Stash
74. GCBF 11/19/2000 New York Boston Cache
75. GCBE 11/20/2000 New York Turkey Cache
76. GCC2 11/24/2000 California Azucar Mine Offset
77. GCC6 11/25/2000 Indiana Turkey Run Stash
78. GCC8 11/25/2000 New Jersey gerbiL cacHe
79. GCC9 11/28/2000 Texas No Walk in The Park
80. GCD2 12/2/2000 California Doggie Do
81. GCD4 12/3/2000 California Bovine Hill Stash
82. GCD6 12/2/2000 California Born Free
83. GCDE 12/10/2000 California Igor
84. GCEO 12/10/2000 Massachussets Aldo's Andover Geocache
85. GCE4 12/11/2000 Connecticut Another Brick In the Wall
86. GCE6 12/12/2000 Massachussetts Willow Brook Wander
87. GCEC 12/16/2000 Rhode Island Brenton Point
88. GCED 12/17/2000 Arizona Senda de Tonto
89. GCEF 12/17/2000 Texas CenTex Prime
90. GCFO 12/15/2000 Scotland Scotland's First
91. GCF1 12/17/2000 Australia Frying Pan
92. GCF2 12/19/2000 Massachussetts The Silver Lake Stash
93. GCF4 12/24/2000 South Carolina Modoc Stash
94. GCF7 11/25/2000 Australia's Used-To-Be Highest
95. GCF9 12/26/2000 Nevada XKD-380
96. GCFA 12/25/2000 Florida Christmas Cache
97. GCFE 12/27/2000 Arizona Diablo Point Cache
98. GCFF 12/27/2000 Pennyslvania Stone Wall Stash
99. GC101 12/27/2000 New York Hudson's Folly
100. GC103 12/28/2000 Denmark High Tension in the Bog
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
And the baby who is always crying
Written circa 2001